I.
I wrote this poem in August 2016 when I was feeling so much pulling me away from myself that I didn’t know what to do. I was trying to work at my desk, but it was hard and I felt like I was barely staying above the surface of what I was feeling. For some reason, I decided to write and, through doing so, a deeper experience of the “pull” came to me and I was freed, a few hours later, as it sank in. May these words bring awareness of the pull that is the ego, of the unconsciousness on the planet, so that you may see how free you already are. Many blessings to you!
Dissolving
There is a part of me that never needs to be fed by anything
as it is complete, whole and self-nourishing.
However, the part of me that feeds off of drama, junk food,
competition, hate, anger, rage, despair,
overwhelming panic and sadness
is present.
It is showing me it is present.
It is wanting me to feed it
endlessly
ceaselessly and
without any regard to conscious action.
I see you.
I feel you.
I know your hunger.
I cannot feed you in the way that you want, crave or need.
I am waking up and you are hungry.
I know you will never be satisfied, that you will always crave, reach, pull, grab and hang on.
I don’t know what to do for you, except to be your witness,
the witness to what drives humanity to be inhuman,
the witness to the cause of the suffering of all beings,
the cause of the competition, greed and destruction
that is now ready to be revealed;
ready to be loved
nurtured
witnessed and
dissolved
through compassion, separation and merging with the wholeness within.
May your dissolving be gentle, peaceful and loving.
May I have the courage to be your witness
no matter how fiercely you crave, hunger or hold on.
I love you and I am here,
separating from you
witnessing you
loving you as your journey comes to this point of completion.
Thank you.
May all beings be blessed with the courage
clarity and awareness to separate from the hunger
and merge with the one who never hungers.
May the homecoming of the one who hungers be glorious.
There is a part of me that never needs to be fed by anything
as it is complete, whole and self-nourishing.
However, the part of me that feeds off of drama, junk food,
competition, hate, anger, rage, despair,
overwhelming panic and sadness
is present.
It is showing me it is present.
It is wanting me to feed it
endlessly
ceaselessly and
without any regard to conscious action.
I see you.
I feel you.
I know your hunger.
I cannot feed you in the way that you want, crave or need.
I am waking up and you are hungry.
I know you will never be satisfied, that you will always crave, reach, pull, grab and hang on.
I don’t know what to do for you, except to be your witness,
the witness to what drives humanity to be inhuman,
the witness to the cause of the suffering of all beings,
the cause of the competition, greed and destruction
that is now ready to be revealed;
ready to be loved
nurtured
witnessed and
dissolved
through compassion, separation and merging with the wholeness within.
May your dissolving be gentle, peaceful and loving.
May I have the courage to be your witness
no matter how fiercely you crave, hunger or hold on.
I love you and I am here,
separating from you
witnessing you
loving you as your journey comes to this point of completion.
Thank you.
May all beings be blessed with the courage
clarity and awareness to separate from the hunger
and merge with the one who never hungers.
May the homecoming of the one who hungers be glorious.
***
II.
I wrote this poem in the summer of 2015 and it is feeling like the right time to share this with others. I was fortunate to share it with a few special people and their feedback encouraged me to share it more openly. May the words within this open letter find their way right into your heart and may they melt away your limiting beliefs about yourself. May you know you are supremely worthy and beautiful. Love, Bradlee
Pre-amble
This morning I was on the bus and I was so inspired by the number of people on the bus and the myriad of experiences they each must be having as they live their own lives.
This morning I was on the bus and I was so inspired by the number of people on the bus and the myriad of experiences they each must be having as they live their own lives.
I saw a young man run from the back of the bus because he saw a girl near the front of the bus whom he probably really liked, and he stood squished next to her seat for the whole
ride, just so he could talk to her.
ride, just so he could talk to her.
I saw another man and woman on the bus who were talking and they looked like they may fall in love and get married in the future. They were just passing through that awkward stage of getting to know one another.
I saw an older gentleman wearing a suit jacket. He had his eyes closed and his face was relaxed and smiling.
I saw a young woman quietly reading the Bible.
During this ride, I felt an opening in my heart as I watched these beautiful people, living their lives. My heart filled with love and the following words came to me:
An Open Letter to all Hearts
If only you could know the beauty that you are.
You are so radiant in all that you do and all that you are.
I see you and I love you.
I see you and I see God.
The majesty of your grace is indescribable with words.
The curve of your neck to your shoulders is as smooth and flowing as a river running through the land.
The color of your hair reflects all of the color that the rainbow wouldn’t even dream of reflecting.
The softness of your heart shines around you and melts my own.
May you know the grace that you are, always have been and always will be.
May you sip the sweet nectar within your heart as it nourishes your body,
sparks the creativity in your mind and carries you through life.
May you be blessed to look in the mirror and love yourself.
May you be blessed to honor and appreciate the magnificence that you are,
that I see in you.
May you know you are never alone, that you are loved both from afar
and within.
May you feel the honor it is for our planet to have us here
as she patiently allows us to destroy her, as part of our journey
to discover the beauty that we are, that she is, that all is.
May you dance the dance of joy that is waiting to radiate
out from under your feet, from your arms, your smiling face,
your fluid spine.
May you be filled with the force of life and may it surround you
in it’s warm blanket of comfort and possibilities.
May you rejoice in who you are, no matter what you have been taught
to think about yourself.
May you know you are worth it.
If only you could know the beauty that you are.
You are so radiant in all that you do and all that you are.
I see you and I love you.
I see you and I see God.
The majesty of your grace is indescribable with words.
The curve of your neck to your shoulders is as smooth and flowing as a river running through the land.
The color of your hair reflects all of the color that the rainbow wouldn’t even dream of reflecting.
The softness of your heart shines around you and melts my own.
May you know the grace that you are, always have been and always will be.
May you sip the sweet nectar within your heart as it nourishes your body,
sparks the creativity in your mind and carries you through life.
May you be blessed to look in the mirror and love yourself.
May you be blessed to honor and appreciate the magnificence that you are,
that I see in you.
May you know you are never alone, that you are loved both from afar
and within.
May you feel the honor it is for our planet to have us here
as she patiently allows us to destroy her, as part of our journey
to discover the beauty that we are, that she is, that all is.
May you dance the dance of joy that is waiting to radiate
out from under your feet, from your arms, your smiling face,
your fluid spine.
May you be filled with the force of life and may it surround you
in it’s warm blanket of comfort and possibilities.
May you rejoice in who you are, no matter what you have been taught
to think about yourself.
May you know you are worth it.
***
III.
In December 2016, I heard the words to this poem bubbling up inside of me, just shortly after wondering how I could better care for myself. I started listening to Ramdesh Kaur’s meditation CD and I listened to the meditation for Conscious Eating and I cried quite a bit. Afterwards, I was left feeling opened wide and these words became so clear that I wrote them as soon as I could. I was very touched with the purity and rawness of my realizations and how willing those emotions were to be captured in words.
Blessings – A turning point
How could I not have known how worthy I am of receiving?
How could I not have seen my true light and value?
How could I have spent the last 36 years without constantly honouring and bowing before the divinity that moves through me, that I am?
May I remember to bless myself, to love myself, to nurture myself and to honour myself.
May I eat food consciously and with gratitude.
May I stretch my beautiful body and feel the strength and grace in my muscles.
May I thank my mind for all the beautiful thinking it does for me.
May I appreciate my joints for bending and staying healthy and lubricated.
May I honour the tremendous amount of work that my organs, skin and bodily systems complete, without ever taking a break.
May I look at myself in the mirror and know that my body temple is magnificent and that it houses my bright and shiny soul who wants to come out to play and to love and to dance with all of creation.
May I remember to thank my heart, for beating and for leading me into this new territory of being open and vulnerable.
May I celebrate the fierce passion arising within me, the one that makes me feel like I have the power to ignite that same fire within the bellies and hearts of all.
May I honour myself so much that I never once question whether I should be authentic or not.
May my heart be light and may I nourish myself with love, healthy food, prayer, chanting, nature, dance and wonderful company as never before.
May every choice I make and every breath I take be rooted in love and gratitude and reverence for the being that I am.
May I always remember that I am worth it and that it is never a sacrifice to stop and take better care of all of my precious self.
Bradlee Zrudlo